For years, I stayed locked in a prison of my own creation.
I built the prison out of faulty communication and assumptions about the future that were based in traumas from the past that I carried with me. Those assumptions were so powerful. Literally, I built pathways in my brain that took me to the same conclusions every time. I didn’t learn from my past, so I was doomed to repeat it.
My prison kept me safe. It kept me from perceived harm. What is unfortunate is that it also kept me from experiencing the fullness of life. It kept me from savoring joy.
I am happy to report that I am out of prison now, and that I have been for a while, but was hard to leave those confines. I engaged in a complex process to tear down the walls of this prison so I would not be tempted to enter again. This process involved somatic therapies that helped me connect my brain with my body. In so doing, I learned to override those long-reinforced pathways in my brain and come to different conclusions. I began to communicate more healthily with others, which helped me to set my own boundaries and recognize my own role in some of the traumas I had suffered. Far from this being upsetting, it was liberating. How empowering it is to realize that you haven’t been a bystander in your own life!
My story is not unique. If you live long enough, you eventually come to realize that you “hold on to things” more than you should. Yes, we hold on to them … until we realize that it’s time to let them go.
I spent Labor Day weekend learning Trauma Touch Therapy, en route (I hope) to being certified in this form of somatic therapy. If any of this sounds familiar, give me a call. I’d love to tell you more about it.